Superflat

• P wanted a Superflat stealthy road bike. The flat black Neuvations won't arrive for another week, but I couldn't help but build up the thing with a bit of color while it waits on display.

  This is a Nothing Fancy build; it's simply a tried and tried 4 pound frame mated to a Rival drivetrain and finished with flat black components throughout, maybe 18.5 with pedals. It's a willing sprinter, but compliant enough for P's epic day-long (or middle of the night) training rides. I'm hoping to see P shame age groupers with rides thrice the price this season.

  This being the first all-black roadie, I'm tempted to dub her KITT, which I suppose make me Edward Mulhare to P's David Hasellhoff. Despite being a fan of Mulhare's oevre (MacGuyver, Megaforce, Battlestar Galactica), I don't think I could possibly do that to P. So he'll have to come up with his own name.

  So sure, it's got some issues (slightly sloping top tube, anatomic bars), but my feeling is that pure road racing machines should always have aesthetic flaws. If a bicycle is too beautiful, the rider might second guess a foolhardy downhill breakaway or dangerous slick course corner in a crit. Racers go down. Bits get mangled, scratched, dented, and dirty. This isn't to say that appearance should be trumped by function, but, well, you wouldn't eat barbeque in a new pair of white Air Force Ones, right? So perhaps that's just it. This bike isn't KITT; it's a pair of black Air Force Ones that are still flash, but ready for everyday action.